What a week! If the physical symptoms of Self-Publishing Syndrome – headaches, insomnia, overwhelming feelings of regret – aren’t enough of a reminder for you of what we’ve been through, here’s a quick recap:
We wrote the book, submitted it to a round of agents we pulled from The Writers’ and Artists’ Yearbook based solely on how many names we recognized in their lists of clients, got rejected by all of them, worked on our books for another bit, moved some stuff around, took out the prologue, submitted it to a round of publishers, got rejected by all of them too, came within inches of setting a My Book Bonfire alight, made a voodoo doll of that TV actress-yogurt spokeperson-talk show host-pop singer who got handed a book deal to “write” a “book” so bad it was an offense to the trees who gave their lives so it could be printed, looked down on self-publishing, looked down a little less on self-publishing, became intrigued by self-publishing, changed our minds about self-publishing, decided to self-publish, told everyone we were doing it because we wanted “more control”, put back in the prologue.
Tuesday morning we took what we thought was a perfectly clean manuscript and exorcised the 24,519 errors in it that we didn’t know were there, and then Tuesday afternoon we tried to make it look like a real book by putting in copyright notices, title pages and chapter headings. We also agonized over who to leave out of the Acknowledgements, i.e. your friends who you’re pretty sure will buy a copy anyway.
The first real bit of fun on this journey/mistake, Wednesday we either a) tried to design a cover that looked at least not completely like a self-published book, b) paid someone else to do it or c) used CreateSpace’s own Cover Creator to produce something that only made our eyes bleed for a little while.
Yesterday we went through the process of uploading all our stuff – our interior, our cover, all of hopes, dreams and aspirations – to CreateSpace, got them to check everything was a-okay and then ordered a proof copy.
Now in the Real World, we would have at least of week of hiding behind a twitching curtain, waiting for the sight of the postman carrying our proof copy (or the package our proof copy is in) up the driveway under his arm, but for the purposes of this 5 Day to a Self-Published Book plan, we’re going to assume that today was the happy day and that you now hold in your hands the proof copy of your very own book.
- Gaze at it adoringly
- Hold it up like Simba in The Lion King
- Take pictures of it
- Take pictures of you holding it
- Go through it line by line and word by word to make sure it’s absolutely perfect.
Once you’re satisfied, go back to CreateSpace, take a deep breath and click ‘Approve Proof.’
Congratulations – you have just published your book! Now go have something alcoholic, and lots of it.